*Closer writer Jack thinks that a partner being unfaithful doesn’t have to spell the end of your relationship. *
According to statistics, 23.4 per cent of married men and 18.3 per cent of married women have cheated on their parters.
But should an infidelity be forgiven?
I believe that, even in the most committed of relationships, slip-ups can – and will – happen.
There is temptation all around. It could be a persistent man in a bar, paying no attention to a woman’s engagement ring. It could be a bored housewife lavishing in the attention of the hunky gym instructor.
These might sound like cliches but actually almost 20 percent of British women admitted they would cheat if there was no risk of being caught.
And I don’t think it necessarily needs to spell the end of your relationship.
They might’ve enjoyed their little fling, but their bit on the side isn’t the person they share a bed with, the person they’ve built a life with or maybe even the person they’ve started a family with.
Whether it’s a one night stand or full-blown affair – some people are just too weak to say no to temptation. But does this mean they don’t love you?
Depending on the length of time you have been with that person who has betrayed you, you owe it yourself – and to the amount of time you have invested – to try and work things out.
It is possible, if you’re both committed, to forgive and to build up the trust that was perhaps shattered.
1/4 men insist they would forgive their partner if they had an affair, and I believe this is because most men don’t see the emotional strings when it comes to sex. So what does this tell you about the woman from the pub they had a quickie in the car park with?
*Closer writer Fiona believes that, once the trust has been broken, there is no going back. *
I like to think that if a partner cheated I could be strong enough to walk away.
Infidelity is often a signifier of deeper issues in a relationship, and more often than not an affair can be the nail in the coffin.
Harmless flirting or a drunken snog is likely forgivable depending on the circumstances, but sleeping with someone else or having an emotional affair can be incredibly hurtful and damaging to a relationship.
Once a partner has had an affair the damage is almost impossible to repair.
I believe that entering a monogamous relationship as something that shouldn’t be considered too lightly, especially if you think you may stray. Many people cheat because they think they will get away with it- it’s almost engrained in our culture as ‘normal’. It’s not normal.
Once the trust is gone how can you rebuild that? I find it hard to believe that couples which ‘survive’ cheating are 100% happy with their relationship. Continuing with an unhappy marriage for the sake of children or money is also unjustifiable. Children can pick up on animosity easily and what price can you put on your happiness?
Ultimately, in an ideal world people should’t cheat, but sadly infidelity is a common occurrence. We should be strong enough to walk away from someone who breaks our trust and allow ourselves to fall out of love with them.
Cheating is a dealbreaker- once that trust is broken the deal is done. Time to call the lawyers in.
Which one of our writers do you agree with? Let us know via the comments box below.