‘My husband hasn’t got a willy –
but we want a New Year baby!’
Friday 21 December 2012
When Becki Anderson first met her handsome husband Luke, she was attracted to his blokey charm. But Luke was hiding a shocking secret – and, after dating her for a month, he revealed to Becki that he was actually born a girl named Laura.
The 31-year-old, who hid his small breasts under a tight vest, told Becki he’d been living as Luke for three years, having testosterone injections to deepen his voice and was on an NHS waiting list to have a mastectomy and a full sex change.
But despite his revelation, Becki said she still loved him – and, even though she’d never had a relationship with a woman before, she didn’t care that he didn’t have a penis.
The pair slept together after a month and, nine months later, in August 2011, they got married.
Now the couple are planning to start a family in 2013 – with the help of an anonymous sperm donor. Broody Becki, 22, from Chester, smiles: “We can’t wait to have a New Year baby. We’ll pick a sperm donor who has features like Luke so the baby looks like both of us. We don’t mind if we have a boy or girl – both eventually would be fantastic! Luke will make a great daddy.”
Luke, who won Big Brother in August, says being the most popular housemate has given him more confidence. And despite having previously longed to have a penis constructed, he’s decided to wait for medical advances because he wants the “best penis available.”
Becky says: “When our child is old enough – perhaps in their teens – we’ll tell them their daddy was born a girl. We’ll bring them up to be open-minded so we’re not worried about how they’ll handle the news.”
Luke (right) as a young girl with brother Bryn
Luke’s been taking male hormones since 2009, which lowered his voice, caused his body to get hairy and made his Adam’s apple and facial bones thicken to look more masculine. He had a double mastectomy last year and is recovering after recently having surgery to remove the scar tissue.
Recalling the moment Luke revealed his past, Becki says: “When Luke told me he was born Laura, I was stunned. He was so masculine – his arms were muscly and covered in tattoos and he had a deep voice. I couldn’t believe it. It was a huge shock, but I wasn’t freaked out or angry – it took a lot for him to tell me.
“His behaviour never gave anything away – he loved rugby and drinking. The only thing that puzzled me was that I’d felt the vest he wore to flatten his breasts when we’d been cuddling. At the time, I’d thought it was a normal vest, just very tight, but after he told me, it made sense.”
Becki adds: “I was curious about his transition. He showed me his childhood pictures, but he looked like a tomboy even then.
“It might sound hard to believe, but I don’t care he hasn’t got a penis. We have an amazing sex life. We try all different toys and positions, though Luke doesn’t wear a strap-on.
When Becki met Luke while waitressing at a hotel in September 2010, aged 20, she’d had two long-term relationships.
“I enjoyed sex with men – I wasn’t attracted to women,” says Becki, who lived at home with her cleaner mum, retired lorry driver dad and salesman brother.
Luke had a double mastectomy last year
“When Luke joined the hotel as a chef, I thought he was gorgeous, charming and funny. He had a tattoo of his ex on his arm – he seemed really blokey.”
And when they kissed for the first time, Becki – who’s now a mortgage advisor – wasn’t disappointed. She says: “He was a great kisser. I imagined sharing my life with him early on because everything seemed so right.”
For the next month, the couple enjoyed dinner dates at Luke’s house, but never went further than kissing. Then Luke dropped his bombshell.
Becki recalls: “He said he had something to tell me, then blurted out: ‘I was born Laura.’ He said he’d wanted to be a boy since he was two and that, aged 14, he’d watched a TV show about a transgender woman and knew he wanted to be like her.
“He’d tried to be ‘normal’ until he was 27 – even dating a man,” Becki explains. “We talked for hours. I didn’t know how I was going to explain everything to my family, but I knew I’d find a way – I was so in love with him.”
Becki stayed that night, but the couple didn’t have sex.
She says: “We just held each other – Luke was self-conscious about his body and wasn’t naked. But I was still attracted to him – I’d never felt that way before.”
A month later, the couple became intimate. Becki says: “Luke wanted the lights dimmed and he kept his binder on. I wasn’t nervous – just excited. It was the best sex I’d ever had.”
Becki moved in with Luke later that month – but he asked her not to tell her family or friends about his past. She explains: “I was confident my family would support us – they really liked Luke. But he was worried people wouldn’t understand.”
Four months later, Luke took off his binder in bed. Becki says: “I didn’t feel uncomfortable touching Luke’s boobs. They were part of him and I loved him.”
A month later, Luke proposed and five months later, the couple had a wedding ceremony at the hotel where they’d met.
“We had 100 guests and I felt guilty for keeping a huge secret from my friends and family, but we knew we’d tell them one day,” says Becki, who had a conventional wedding because Luke had been living as a man for three years and changed his name.
Two months later, Luke had a double mastectomy. Becki says: “It had always been his plan and he was pleased with his new flat chest, which made me happy.”
In May 2012, two weeks before Luke went in the Big Brother house, the couple told Becki’s family about his past.
“We hadn’t told my parents before, because Luke was worried they’d treat him differently – he often went for a beer down the pub with my dad, just like one of the boys. He didn’t want that to change,” she says. “But he knew we had to tell them one day and we didn’t want them finding out on TV. Even if Luke hadn’t gone on Big Brother we’d have still told them eventually.
“Luke told Dad alone. He said his palms were sweaty and he was worried Dad would disapprove. But Dad said as long as Luke looked after me, it didn’t make a difference,” says Becki.
“I told my mum and brother together. Mum was worried about how Luke and I would have a family, but I told her there were lots of options and she said as long as I was happy, she’d support us.”
When Luke – who’s given his family some of his £50,000 BB winnings and plans to put the rest towards a house – revealed his past on TV in June, the couple’s colleagues and Becki’s friends were supportive, too. Becki says: “We had lots of nice calls – everyone was amazed by how well Luke had transitioned.”
Luke’s family – including his parents, retired mum Chris, 59, and factory manager dad Bill, 56, and brother Bryn, 28 – also support the couple.
Luke adds: “Becki loves me for who I am, we have a great sex life and we’re happy. We can’t wait to have a family – we’ll use a donor who looks like me – dark hair and short. We don’t mind about their education or occupation.”
And Luke, who spoke to his GP and specialist at the gender clinic about his options last month, insists using a sperm donor won’t make him feel less of a man.
He says: “It’ll give us the family we dream of. I’ll bring up the baby and do all the Daddy things. When we buy a house, the first room we’ll decorate will be the nursery. I think I’ll make a great dad and I know Becki will be a brilliant mum.”
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